Yugantar Writes

(It took me 8 days to write this letter, joining parts and bringing them together. Sorry to be out of touch) Dear,     This one is my first letter to you. I do not know even if I have the right to call you 'dear', but, let us build on with it; at least for this letter. This letter is not just a love letter. This letter is recollection of my memoir, the way I had been and the way I am now. I don’t know that if you even care, but, yes, I know you will definitely run your eyes through these words after getting this letter.     You might have known when this all begun right? Right from the day you promised our friendship would never end. My hands were wrapped around yours, it was pitch dark, but I could still feel the warmth of your heart and see the smile of yours. No wonder that was the best evening with you. Days passed, I grasping your hand and walking back home, oh those days were wonderful.     But the way I am getting the things now, I feel I was just too dumb. I

Do reckon, I have a heart too. Believe it or not, This heart is fragile too, It bawls when it's strings are pulled It thuds when you come in like hurricane and leave with same swiftness, And yes, It tries to stop, with every single good bye of yours. You know, I feel like I am the 'Parker' on your pen stand, That you never lay your  hands on. I feel like I am the song on your playlist, That you skip every single time. I feel like an empty paper, Crushed and thrown into dustbin. But, you know what? I am not surprised, I was prepared, You  know, it happens all the time. And the reason? I am never at the 'curtain calls' For, I am amidst the curtains and the pulleys. Getting back, I am always there, Even if you do not care, Do come back.

Let me make it clear at the beginning, neither am I the motivational speaker or preacher nor the guy who pushes you to get more of yourself. I am just trying to share what I feel about ourselves. Believe me, we are just normal. We cannot get over anything right? Yes, that’s us; typical teenagers. We are hard at ourselves sometimes and sometimes too soft. We have typhoon swirling in our minds. It's the storm of agony, thunder of love, the avalanche of anger, the flood of woe, and sometimes the slight zephyr of motivation. You find yourself on parabolic curve of a function concave both downwards and upwards- sometimes you get yourself at the local maxima and sometimes at local minima. That's typical of us, completely normal; believe me. Just little things wandering over our minds every time! Depressions, broken relationships, hardships, boring classes, just a bit of cigarette you started smoking from yesterday, the lecture of mechanics you missed or that wonderful girl fro

You think I will miss you? No, I won't! You think I can't live without you? Yes, I can! You think I am completely, exhaustingly in love with you? No, I am not! Then why? Why do I suppurate every single time when your name is taken? Why do I want to cling with you the rest of my life? Why do I look at you once, twice and again, and again? Why can I never forget you? Why do I try to sneak in every time I pass by you? Why do I keep on searching chances to get inside you? WHY? You are illusory. You talk of virtuous grades and niftier broods. You talk of dreams and ambitions. You talk of making friends and memories. You talk of leading the world. You talk of holding the head high- but hearts; you never talk about hearts breaking here right? You never told me that I was going to be away from you someday? Why didn't you ever tell me that here, people don't make friends, they grow into a family. Why didn’t you tell me that missing you would never be enough? WHY? You think

Let me be clear, if you fall in love with me like the way I have fell for you, I would make sure I destroy every part of you. I would not leave any part well. I don't say they would be cold as the wind blows but would definitely want me every time. It will begin normally with great good morning and loving good night texts - and I will remind you how much your texts makes me smile. I will always stay on top list, remind you of my existence even if I am not around or busy with my guitar with nil balance on my cell. I would make you listen my stories and poems. You would hear my thumb rattling through guitar and my creepy voice over it. And when you will listen to any songs with guitar, I promise you would remember that. We would go on walks. I would hold your hand tight and tighter, intertwine our fingers and caress the back of your palm with my thumb, and your palm with my pinky. I'll imprint my hand marks on your hand, and if someone else holds your hand, just the way I